Friend in need is a friend indeed. We have been taught this since childhood but still we all make mistakes, even when it comes to friendships. Betrayal of trust, misunderstandings, long distance and many other things ruin perfectly good friendships. But then, there is one friend who is not a “friend” to you as he does more harm than good. They are never easy to spot and sometimes you are so blind that you don’t realize how they are the ones responsible for your melt downs and depressive days. These are those psuedo-buddies who only want to extract their benefit out of you. They will ask for your help when they need it, but they will never be present when you need them. Here is how you can figure out if you are surrounded by someone like it:
Real friends want to celebrate.
When you achieve something, your real friends are ready to party along with you for your success but the toxic friend is going to be jealous. They might make a believable excuse to get out of it or will be standing in a corner all the time, while you and your rest of the “real” friends are having a gala time. They are never happy about your achievements and it might show on their face.
Toxic friends take up a lot of your time.
There are times when you just want to be alone. You feel the need to lock yourself up and do your work, note, that it happens when you have some important work to do, not that you are depressed. Real friends might be bothered or show up at your door but the toxic ones aren’t going to leave you alone. They take up a lot of your time so that you don’t end up doing anything productive.
Further Reading: Fake Friends: How To Spot Them, Avoid Them, And Move On
Toxic friends call you only when they need some help.
One thing which could be noticed well is that real friends will call you up for no reason and just to know how well you are doing or if you want to hang out, but toxic friends only ring your bell when they require a certain help from you. Guess what dude, you better not help them anymore and show them their place. Don’t let anyone take advantage of you like that!
Toxic friends crib about your other friends.
Real friends never mind if you are hanging out with someone they don’t like because they know that both of you have different opinions regarding people. They aren’t going to judge you for your choices but the toxic friends are going to be so bothered that they will crib and complain to you about your other friends.
Further Reading: 5 Types of Toxic People and How to Spot and Deal with Them
Toxic friends try to control you.
The one relationship which doesn’t require any compromise is friendship! It is very true and if your friend constantly tries to control you or change you, it’s time that you let them know that it won’t happen. Real friends gladly accept you the way you are and they never bother to manipulate you into feeling that you are good for nothing.
Further Reading: 6 Signs of Fake Nice People You Should be Aware of
Real friends are empathetic.
If you have done something wrong, real friends will make you realize your mistake but they will still show you support and be concerned about your feelings, whereas toxic friends are hurtful and they will make you feel even worse about your actions.
Toxic friends lose their temper.
Just like I mentioned in the point above, toxic friends don’t know how to show respect to you which is why anger often overtakes their state of mind. They would drop their self-respect or maybe they don’t have any at the first place. All they have is ego and you better get away from such friends as quickly as you can!
Further Reading: How To Deal With People Who Try To Tear You Down
Real friends enjoy the discussion.
Even if you both have a difference of opinion they will be happy to discuss the matter without any yelling match, but toxic friends always want to win over the argument and prove themselves right. They are very disappointed if they fail to convince you into thinking that they are right and it can cause a fight as well.