It is wrong to believe that the end of a relationship can be cured with drastic proceedings and excessive outpouring of emotion. True, and therefore the easiest way for overcoming love relationship takes place through a process that takes time and a little work on it.
Ending a love relationship is never easy. The stored-up emotion are not easy to live out constructively and instead of letting them to the surface and deal with them, we often direct them wrong which extremely damage us in the long run. As with any difficult situation in life, break up of the relationship need to be accepted and we need to deal with it. Here are a few ways that can help to finally release the old relationship and get ready for a new love and a healthier start.
Sadness is a normal part of the process, but the self-blame is not taking you anywhere – Free yourself from heavy analysis
After the break up of a relationship, many women are prone to do largely analyzes that often end up with the conclusion that there is something wrong with them. Yes, maybe you could do something different, maybe you could spot a problem before and maybe you should be smarter, but no one is perfect, and neither are you. A self-critical analysis leads to nowhere. Instead of it, try focusing on the good things in your life — good friends, interesting job, fulfilling hobby or a harmonious family. When you caught by the need to analyze, stop, remember all the goods in your life and be thankful for all this. In this way, you do not deny your emotions, but you carry with them on the mature way.
You may think you have made the biggest mistake of your life. You feel that you would not have suffered if you had not done that. That is not productive thinking and will not bring you anything good. Instead, remind yourself that you are only human and that your mistakes in life are permitted, as well as to everyone else. Explain to yourself that you learn from the mistakes and just through that learning you can make life more beautiful and interesting. If you want to love again in the future, you need to forgive yourself. You need time for forgiveness so do not blame if you do not forgive within two days. Take your time and cherish self-love. Only then you will open yourself to the new love.
Further Reading: 10 Things You Learn From Your First Heartbreak
Time cannot be wasted
Now when you turn around and see how flew the two years of unhealthy relationship, you tend to think that it is wasted time. But, is this true? In those two years were certainly beautiful moments in this relationship. Surely you have discovered new things about yourself, but also about other people and the world. You probably, from the most difficult moments, came out as a better and greater person. Can you say then that this wasted time? Try to look at things from a positive perspective and remember that there is no time that is lost. Maybe you are not aware now of what you have learned in all this time, but once you will figure it out.
Further Reading: 8 Nifty Hacks for Getting Over a Breakup
Remember good things as well as bad
Neurologists believe that almost 20 percent of people suffer from “complicated sadness”. It is a persistent feeling of longing for the person you have lost mixed with romantic memories of the relationship. The problem is that this is a biological occurrence and longing for a man can become a kind of addiction because in the brain occur specific chemical compounds. The result is that we remember reveries and illusions from our relationship that we have created by ourselves. We remember our relationship as an ideal relationship. The reality is much different — neither he nor you are perfect, and relationship was not like that. Remember the beautiful moments, but also certainly remember those less beautiful, no matter how much difficult reality is.
Connect with yourself
There are people who can not be alone and they go from relationship to relationship. Neither one did suffer, but they immediately switched to another relationship. No need to mention that it is quite dangerous behavior. Namely, this approach to relationships is moving you away from yourself, and knowing and accepting yourself is a key prerequisite of quality and healthy relationship. Therefore, it is recommended that after the break up, you take enough time to grieve, and to meet and connect with yourself. When you do that, you will be ready for a new healthy relationship that will have a good chance to be long lasting and happy.
Further Reading: How to Get over Someone You Deeply Love