“You don’t deserve to be happy. You’re not smart enough to do that. Have you looked yourself in the mirror lately? How can anyone take you seriously if you’re so stupid? Look at yourself, you’re so ugly /you’ll never find love.”
Does this sound familiar to you? We are all our worst enemy, and the voice in our head is more powerful than we think. That voice in our head can be so negative that it affects our daily life, it prevents us from making our dreams come true and keeps us away from true happiness. You don’t really think you don’t deserve a real happiness, do you? Consult your inner voice again.
What is a critical inner voice?
We all have a critical inner voice, but what is a critical inner voice in reality? Destructive thoughts toward ourselves. Enough to say. These destructive thoughts are so well integrated into our minds that affect our relationships with other people.
Your critical inner voice undermines your confidence, desire and willingness to fulfill your plans and hampers your progress in life.
Starting point of this inner critic
Now, this persistent negative inner voice must have begun at some point. Most of the time it comes from childhood experiences that we internalize. This is often derived from our parents or partners, because children pick up the negative attitudes that parents have, not only toward their children but also toward themselves and others.
Our inner critical voice is usually degrading and punishing and can lead us to make unhealthy decisions and make us feel separated from the rest of the world and the people close to us.
At some point, this inner critical voice gets out of control and sabotages every aspect of our life. When this happens, we fall into a severe depression that never seems to improve. Over time, our mind is set in a pattern of negative thoughts and our life seems to go nowhere. Sounds awful, right?
Further Reading: How to Be Yourself
How to reconvert and silence your inner voice
The good news is that the inner voice is learned, it is not something we are born with. It is possible to learn to inhibit your inner critical voice and recover your life and your inner peace.
Yes, you can do this because you are amazing and it is up to you to be the best you can be. So this is how you can combat the critical inner voice:
- Learn where these voices come from (our parents, an old relationship, our brothers or mates, or perhaps stalkers from your school when you were a child). Once you know where the problems started, you know where to start with the healing process.
- We need to forgive ourselves for all the horrible things we say to our inner self. A great way to do this is with affirmations of forgiveness. Every morning, stand in front of the mirror, look directly into the eyes and say one of these statements: “I forgive myself for not believing in me”, “I forgive myself for self-deprecation that I feel every day”, “I forgive my inner voice for being so horrible and negative.“ Or use some that you feel are right for you.Further Reading: How to Listen to Your Heart, When Your Mind Disagrees
- Understand how your negative voice is affecting your life. When you’re about to apply for the job of your dreams but the inner voice tells you that you’re not smart enough to even get an interview, then you didn’t even try. That would be your inner voice affecting your life in a negative way.
- You need to learn to identify that voice when it begins. “You know you’re not good enough, are you?” Stop right there. Your inner critical voice has begun again.
- When you have identified that voice when it occurs, you need to replace those thoughts with a positive inner voice.
Further Reading: 8 Hacks To Constantly Improve Yourself
Here we leave you some negative sentences that you probably tell yourself and the positive phrases with which you should replace them.
“You are so stupid” – “You are extraordinarily intelligent”
“You’re so fat“- “You have such a beautiful skin”
“You’re not good enough”- “You’re amazing”
“You’ll never achieve anything” – “You’ll create a wonderful life”
“How could anyone love you?”- “I absolutely love myself”
“You don’t deserve happiness” – “I deserve all the happiness of the world”.